Talking to Your Child about Starting Therapy
Starting therapy can feel like a huge step for both parents and children. It is common for parents to feel nervous and uncertain about a new activity in the child’s schedule and having to explain the concept of therapy to their child.
A conversation about therapy goes beyond the practicalities; it also allows a time for connection and openness between parent and child. Here are some helpful tips to help you prepare for a conversation with your child about starting therapy.
How does therapy help me?
Therapy is a space where any individual, regardless of age, can have a dedicated time and space to understand their feelings and develop new skills. Children, and adults, sometimes worry that going to therapy means something is broken or wrong with them.
By framing therapy through a strengths-based lens, you can help your child feel more comfortable, confident, and reassured about starting this journey.
Using age-appropriate language
Once you feel grounded in your own approach, the next step is finding the right words for your child's age and stage. Using simple language and metaphors makes understanding accessible. Here are some examples of introducing a psychologist and therapy:
“A psychologist is like a feelings doctor. Just like we go to the doctor to help our body feel better, a psychologist helps us when our feelings feel big or tricky."
"Everyone has things they find hard sometimes, whether it's maths, sport, or managing big emotions. A psychologist is someone who helps you practise the skills to handle those hard things."
Getting curious together
You did the hard work and helped explain what therapy is like to your child, and that matters enormously. After the conversation, some children might have questions about therapy that we might not have anticipated. It can feel pressurising to have all the answers, however it is also an opportunity to embrace their questions and explore them together.
Here are some questions and suggested responses:
Am I in trouble?
Not at all. Going to therapy is actually something brave and smart. It means you're learning to take care of yourself.
Does that mean something is wrong with me?
No, therapy is for everyone. Some adults go to therapy, because everyone needs support sometimes.
Will you tell them everything about me?
The psychologist's job is to listen to you. What you share is mostly private, but we have to tell your parents if there is something happening that is unsafe. We can talk about what that looks like before your first visit.
How long do I have to go?
We'll figure that out together as we go. It's not forever, it's just for as long as it's helpful.
Do I have to answer all the questions?
Answer what you are comfortable with letting your psychologist know. You can also ask them questions!
If you don't know the answer to something your child asks, it's perfectly okay to say that you aren’t sure and find out together with the psychologist.
You are not alone in this journey
At Mind in Mind Psychology, we believe the journey with parents is as important as the journey with your child. Our psychologists partner alongside parents to understand your child’s preferences and responses to new situations to ensure the conversation is tailored to their needs.
If you have any questions about how to prepare your child for their first session, please don't hesitate to reach out to our team. We would love to help.
Resources
Written by Charmaine Tan, Registered Psychologist
